Swing Vote opens on Friday, and I'd like to go on record saying this movie will suck huge monkey balls. King Kong's balls, this movie will suck.
From what I can infer from the over-hyped, over-played trailer is that Kevin Costner plays Kevin Costner (but his friends call him Bud) in an alternate universe where he has a daughter he doesn't care about and voter turnout in the continental US has raised to an all time high of 100% and Kevin Costner is the only man who hasn't voted, thus leaving the task of picking his country's next leader squarely on our hero's shoulders. Both candidates then proceed to "swing his vote" to their side in what will inevitably be a giant pissing contest, with the American health care, education, and military systems as the target.
From what I can infer from the over-hyped, over-played trailer is that Kevin Costner plays Kevin Costner (but his friends call him Bud) in an alternate universe where he has a daughter he doesn't care about and voter turnout in the continental US has raised to an all time high of 100% and Kevin Costner is the only man who hasn't voted, thus leaving the task of picking his country's next leader squarely on our hero's shoulders. Both candidates then proceed to "swing his vote" to their side in what will inevitably be a giant pissing contest, with the American health care, education, and military systems as the target.
"Well, I was going to vote for Obama, but his name wasn't on the ballot... so I left."
What's perhaps most intriguing (read: aggravating) about this set-up is that the two MEN running for President are Whiter than Wonderbread Kelsey Grammar and Whiter, but in a more "Southern" way, Dennis Hopper. What is this, the 1940's? Times have changed man, if anyone's been paying attention to CNN, The Daily Show, or every magazine cover in the past six months.
The results are in.
What could have been a well timed and topical commentary on this, a revolutionary year for American politics, will end up being a mushy, manipulative, Oscar bait performance piece about family, probably, and maybe courage, and civic duty, I guess.
"I thought I'd use this new found fame to launch my band, The Costner Brothers. My what? No.. my brother isn't in the band, that's just what it's called... everyone else is doing it."
Even after 6 years of parading white guy after white guy through the white house, the creative team behind The West Wing had the foresight to mix it up a little by introducing Jimmy Smits as presidential long shot Matt Santos, a Hispanic congressman who favored honesty and integrity over winning the election.
In order to evolve we must change.
Now, don't get me wrong. It's not that I hate white people, or men. I believe there are a multitude of qualities one must have to fill the role of President (and succeed in doing a good job), and not being white isn't necessarily one of them. Some of this country's greatest Presidents have been white men, that's an undisputed fact. However, so have some of the worst.
I just think it's time we allow the people in power to be more representative of the people in their country, and maybe, for now, that means a person who didn't grow up privileged in Texas, or on the East Coast. Sure, those two regions are important, but it's evident that those white people have their shit together. It's the people in the flyover states, of all races, (see any Michael Moore documentary for examples) who need attention.
